What are Sub-Personalities?
Every normal, healthy human being has a number of sub-personalities.
Personality is comprised out of many parts, just think of it like people inside your mind. Each one has its own view of the world, may or may not like the other parts, may team up with some, may fight with others, may ignore them.
There are lots of dynamics inside you head, just like in a community of people. They behave just like people, form alliances, have moods, a unique purpose or job, strengths and weaknesses. You can view them as a team of superheroes, trying to save you on a daily basis.
What you call “I”, is a composite of all parts, fluid, and dynamic. Without awareness of them it is hard to distinguish them from each other.
Each part has a unique talent, like the member of a sports team or an orchestra. They are all meaning well. There is no "evil" sub-self. Some of them have problematic or unhealthy habits, like smoking, overeating, being “shy”, depression, but they can also be very powerful and dedicated.
So, if they are talented and well-intentioned, why are there any problems with it? Just like in groups of people, it is difficult to form a team with a bunch of egos – everyone absolutely convinced that only their own solution makes sense.
Parts always want to help. Often they are misinformed, and they never learned how to communicate or cooperate. Their strategies seem to make no practical sense, some are even very destructive. Also, some of the “live” in the past.
They are evaluating “reality” by comparing sensory input with old memories, raising the alarm - often with outdated information.
As the brain evolves growing up, it creates special sections evaluating sensory input to filter out unnecessary information to be able to focus on what fulfills survival needs the most and what is dangerous and needs to be avoided.
They originate from behavior that was formed in early childhood in an attempt to survive. Repetitions or extreme traumatic single events form a pattern, a habit to adapt to the environment. Habits are perfectly useful to automate processes, making room in your awareness for what is new and still needs to be evaluated.
Sub-Personalities are “programmed” in early childhood to take over tasks for you, while you are thinking about something completely different. Emotions are the main hot-line guiding your system to what “feels” the most relevant – this is why they are so fast and “unspecific”.
Each sub-personality needs to be seen, recognized for its role, appreciated for its help, and respectfully communicated with. If you or others approach them with an agenda, or “wanting to get rid of them”, they will not be available. They also need to feel secure, important, and useful. Many people as young children never felt recognized, valued, protected, or safe. Over time, these missing needs can be fulfilled – by yourself, not by anyone else.
Our parts can be in extreme roles: paralyzed, exhausted, hysterical, repressed, or overwhelmed. They cannot be "killed” or “deleted” because they're areas of our brain, but they do know about the process of “exiling”.
This is why when first working on your system, some parts might not trust this, in fear of losing their job and/or being banished, or exiled – just like it happened to other parts before. But when approached with understanding and care, they can learn to fulfill a new role, or improve their strategies in their old roles.
